[S1E5] Sliding Into DMs
"The party has initially been sent down on a mission by the arcanist Allura Vysoren in search of a halfling paladin who's gone missing, named Lady Kima of Vord. A folk hero and very respected individual, she went on a vision quest and apparently went alone into Kraghammer seeking some sort of great evil that was festering beneath the city and hasn't been seen for weeks and weeks. The party was hired by Allura to go and try to find [Kima's] whereabouts and hopefully bring her back safely.
"Since traversing and meeting individuals in Kraghammer they then spearheaded into the Greyspine mines where apparently these monstrosities had been burbling out time and time again over the past few weeks. Pushing down, they had encounters with umber hulks, they managed to inquire some duergar which apparently there are a lot of them down here (duergar being an ashy-skinned, subterranean, dark, evil dwarf-type offshoot). One of which had with it a brain-type quadruped that managed to brain spike Grog and send him catatonic for a short time.
"Through a strange crazy plan they came up with, they managed to fly undetected via flying carpet, giant eagle, and floating sorcerer, over the entire warcamp, made a Metal Gear run into the center of their main barracks, threw a bucket of goblin shit into the face of the one mind flayer, after which Vax bisected it pretty much in one surprise round of attacks, lead into a large battle in the center of this building, partway through of which the ground began to rumble and then, digging forth from underneath, a bulette, a gargantuan armored burrowing creature that was hungry and very dangerous, that then made the battle that much more intense. A heavy blood-filled battle later, involved with Percy getting his hand caught and firing his gun into the gullet of the beast, eventually, it had its armor pulled apart and was defeated by the party. The remnants of the duergar army inside of this building have been destroyed aside from a few stranglers that have laid their weapons down and the general now lies beaten on his knees before the rest of the party."
The general also tells them of a secret side entrance into Emberhold. As a reward, the group decides to let him live, but will take his weapons and his clothes. To that end, Vax slices the general's belt, causing it to fall, but his armor keeps his pants up.
The general doesn't like this idea. Respectively, he turns invisible and flees toward the exit, bringing with him the warhammer, which Grog had already earmarked for himself. Dissatisfied to be left empty-handed, Grog and Vax proceed to finish the general. However, Clarota is ahead of them. He wraps his tentacles around the general's head and consumes his brain. After his "meal", for a moment, Clarota looks a little younger, a little stronger, a little more dangerous. Residual memories from the general allow Clarota to declare, "He spoke the truth about the path into the Emberhold."
Bells and horns sound off in the warcamp. Vex uses Dust of Tracelessness and sprinkles it around the room as they prepare to leave. Keyleth casts Pass without Trace, turns into an eagle and scoops up the gnomes. They all take off, flying from the barracks. Thirty duergar are now rushing towards it. They are spotted, and a stream of javelins are fired up at them, hitting Grog, Keyleth, and Percy. Tiberius shoots a fireball at the duergar, taking out twelve.
They briefly care for the wounded and unconscious before running towards the back of the camp, through the buildings, to the main tunnel, making it into the tunnel before hearing bolts from the ballistae hitting the walls above them. Looking back, they see Clarota, levitating towards the tunnel, get shot with two ballistae bolts. As he begins to falter, Tiberius casts Glacial Blast beneath him and Clarota slides down into the tunnel. Keyleth raises her hands and the blackened stonework of the tunnel shakes for a second then a giant thick wall of natural rock closes off the entire tunnel behind them. Just on the other side of the stone wall, javelins and other things are being shot at the stone wall but it's keeping the duergar at bay.
Vax jumps onto the back of one of the ogres, slashing and pulling open its flesh, eviscerating it. Vex fires the explosive arrow at the second ogre. It arcs slightly and smacks into the side of its chest. The explosion rocks the vicinity, toppling the cart. A glass container that was in the back of the cart shatters. Tiberius blasts the ogre with three Scorching Rays. As each explosion hits, its flesh ripples from the impact and exposes bone. It gives out a horrible roar. The cart shifts and something amorphous and liquid emerges.
One of the party hears clacking sounds on the ceiling and sees two hook horrors scurrying across before both of them leap down. With a funky grin, Tiberius picks up the creature next to him with Telekinesis and throws it in the lava pool. It sizzles and shrieks in pain as it sinks into the pool. Scanlan, worried that Pike is in danger, Inspires her and successfully Dominates the monster near her. Vax runs and jumps over the lava pool. As he does, the creature there claws at him. Once he lands, he slashes the oozes with his daggers and their acid splashes his arms.
Percy takes two shots at the little oozes. Keyleth shapes into an eagle and flies behind the oozes then returns to human form and casts Thunderwave. Pike sprints to Grog and casts Cure Wounds on him. Grog ends his rage. He tries running back to the creature near the ice spike, but takes hits from the oozes and falls unconscious.
Clarota, taking a note from Tiberius, uses his own Telekinesis to lift the large ooze and slam it on top of the hook horror already in the lava pool, completely dissolving the hook horror. The second, dominated hook horror moves to the edge of the lava pool and strikes twice at ooz in the lava, causing it to dissipate, spraying acid across, which breaks Scanlan's domination. Tiberius throws two Ice Spikes at the hook horror, trying to push it into the lava pool, but it holds its ground. Scanlan arcs his sword at the hook horror, piercing where Tiberius' ice spikes embedded, cracking open the armored shell.
Vex marks the ooze by her brother and makes two bow attacks, killing it. Vax throws his two daggers at the ooze. They begin to sink in, but they teleport back to his Blinkback Belt. Percy takes two shots at the ooze. It splats against the wall and liquefies. Keyleth hooks two ends of her Thorn Whip into the creature and rips it apart. The creature plummets into the magma and the still-sizzling form of the ooze.
They tread for another half-hour until it opens up into a familiar cavern to some. They are in the crevasse where Keyleth and Vex met Clarota. It is also familiar to Pike, as she saw this in her vision. They take this opportunity to collect Trinket.
Four beans spill out, triggering four events. First, three things that don't matter at all happen. One bean causes five eggs to appear. Another causes a geyser to erupt from the center of the elevator shaft and shoot apple juice upwards 30 feet into the air. The third bean brings 11 pink toads into existence, which when touched will turn into a large or small monster of Anthony's / the DM's choice.
As the pyramid lands there's a huge shock wave; this time, everyone manages to hold on except for Ron, who starts to fall. Darryl attempts to stab his javelin into the side of the pyramid to lean down and grab Ron, but ultimately fails and begins falling too. Glenn throws his nun-chucks to wrap around Darryl's legs and catch him at the same time that Ron uses the Hat of Vermin to release three frogs with sticky hands in an attempt to hold onto the pyramid's side. Two frogs are sticky enough and Ron holds onto them to ride the pyramid down. As the pyramid stops moving and settles onto the ground, the daddies are now safe from the threat of falling to their death.
Lark is able to be uncovered from the rubble and he is barely conscious. Henry leaves his wolf form to turn back into a human and rushes to the twins, where he instantly starts casing cure wounds and asking for his pants. Darryl asks the naked people to help find them, when Everything emerges with them and yells to ask what the hell they did. She says they are absolutely not cool anymore considering how batshit this is and how many people most definitely died here. Ron says "Thanks for Everything" and she promptly asks where the nearest church is, thinking this is her fault for giving them the beans in the first place.
Lark wakes up and asks if they did it, and if the Doodler has been summoned, to which Henry says they'll be having a long talk about this later and that he is very grounded. Sparrow wakes up quickly after and excitedly asks Henry if he went into wolf mode; he is also grounded, and Henry grounds himself. Then the grounding is lifted because Henry says he loves them. Lark is upset that he "missed his chance to kill a god", and Henry assures him they'll have a bonding moment too soon. The blue coats start asking around to see what happened and the daddies notice a lot of people starting to point in their direction. Luckily, their van is near, and they decide they should get going.
But as they are driving away, Sparrow attempts to tell Henry he feels nauseous, before instantly vomiting as his eyes roll back into his head. His eyes turn purple and he starts speaking in a voice that isn't his own, saying that while Henry has found his children he has yet to learn anything. The voice says Henry has proven he is unworthy as a father and does not deserve these children- then they both start to fade out of existence. Henry frantically asks Lark and Sparrow what's happening. Sparrow reaches out and asks if he did good, and Henry assures him he did great before both children fade out of existence.
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